Happy for you . . .

We've been working on finding something more pleasant to say when someone gets something we want and we get nothing. We've ruled out saying "ME ME ME ME" and "I want one! I want one!" and decided that saying "I'm happy for you," would be nice. Jamie and I have been role-playing this and the kids have been practicing it in silly ways.

This morning, Juliana showed Andy the very cool mini-flashlight that she acquired yesterday during her big day in Seattle. You have to know that for Andy-The-Gizmo-Kid, there is nothing more attractive than an item that has both buttons and lights. With shaking voice he looked at it and said, "I'm happy for you Juliana." Then he burst into tears.

I'm so proud of him! I buried him in hugs and told him what a good boy he was.

In the orphanage they didn't give things to children unless they had one for everyone, or if it was a shared item. The idea of one child having a private possession and the other child not having is a big new concept. We are so pleased that they are accepting it.

Yesterday we went to Children's to see a doctor who said that Juliana was tiny. We are seeing a series of specialists who are all ruling out bad things, so it is rather good that all the doc has to say is that she is very small. We don't want the doc coming into say that she has some really interesting and unusual condition. But still, driving all that way to hear that she is little seems a bit unproductive.

My mom went with us and we redeemed the drive by going to Bellevue. We stopped in to visit my Father-in-law at work who was very pleased to see us. Then we went to the mall and rode the glass elevator up and down and waved at all the giant snowman and gasped at the flying reindeer and visited the LUSH store. We tried very hard to visit Trader Joe's, but after an hour of driving (slow progress due to street-lights being out), we got there only to find them without power and closed. They couldn't sell anything, as neither their tills nor fridges were working, but they did have a little generator going to keep the lights on; they kindly let us in so that Juliana could use the bathroom. At long last, I finally got into a Trader Joe's, I just didn't get to buy anything.

So that is all the news. Part of my long lull in posting was a case of the blues brought on by the return of Holly's cancer. Surgery is on Friday.

Back to our regularly scheduled interview

How are you preparing yourselves for potential physical- and mental-health issues your children face or may face once they come home?

Both children are patients of record with the Center for Adoptive Medicine in Seattle. They will both have full assessments when we get home. Given the medical info we came home with, we have an understanding of the full range (least disruptive to most disruptive) of possible medical concerns. For mental health issues, they are losing everything that is familiar – another loss on top of their previous losses of their first or birth mothers, losses that I highly doubt they were every able to grieve. We expect that as soon as they get settled in they start to feel these sorrows and we will help them walk through it. Additionally, as orphanage life is highly regimented, and as there is security in knowing what comes next – especially at a time of such change – we will keep the orphanage schedule and meal patterns for quite awhile.

We are Smitten

Oh what a day. First the children (yes, plural) are healthy and appeared to like us and we had a lovely time. I oughtn't say much more than that, as they are not yet ours, and we haven't officially met her and are in fact awaiting permission to met her. We played with all seven children and we all had lots of fun.

So we got picked up and drove about a half an hour to the outskirts of town to an orphanage that houses many kids. Our groupa (the seven kids) have to themselves a groupa room (toys, craft and game table, mini tea table and tea sets etc., a sleeping room with about a dozen little beds (all neatly made) and one big person bed, and a lavatory (two toilets, a stand & and spray tub, a sink, and seven little toothbrushes lined up in cups on the shelf above seven little towel sets: hand towels and leg & foot towels.) But I am getting ahead of ourselves.

We arrived and approached the entryway just as the director was also entering (see pic). We followed her to her office where we were introduced and joined by a care-giver. We asked lots of questions and got a general idea of the children's daily routines and meals. It is obvious that the care-giver at this meeting, as well as the other ones we interacted with, are fond of the children and look after them well.


Then we were escorted down a short hallway and into the groupa room. We saw Andy immediately, playing on the floor in the center of the room. There were six other kids in the room, also all playing alone as they had done group things all day and this was "free play" time. Andy jumped up and gathered up chairs for us. When he noticed the discrepancy between the chair size (wee) and Jamie's size (giant), he went down the hall to fetch a big person chair for him. The care-givers say that this is typical of him, to see and meet needs.

We brought a puzzle which we all assembled together, the seven kids and Irena our translator, and Jamie and I. Here we got to interact with the little girl that we hope to gain a referral for. She is delightful and that is all I can say. Sorry.

We also brought a weird set a toys that we found here that was like an erector set made of that soft noodle material that summer floaties are made of. They loved it. We loved it. The other grown-ups loved it. We all had fun.


Towards the end of the visit, I took a look at the books to gauge what proportion of text to pictures would be appropriate as we select books to bring on Friday's visit. Andy was very keen on picking out books with me (gotta love that) and we tried to read one. It was during this that I think he figured out that we have different words for things. Previously, he had been looking at us with an expression of puzzled concern. He pointed to things and waited. I said it in English, he repeated. He said it in Russian. I repeated. Then he went ahead a few pages to look for more instances; I think he was checking to see if the word I gave was consistent or random. One of these "test" words was mouse. About 15 minutes later we finished the book and found a mouse on the last page. He remembered it in English! He seems to be quick and curious and is a delight to spend time with.

Tomorrow we will be picked up at 9:30 and visit until noon. Then we will go shopping for all the things the director mentioned, at our urging, would be useful. They appreciated the socks and undies that we took today.

The orphanage is sparkling clean and has lots of healthy plants growing inside which the kids are taught to care for. The play yard is dreary, but that is the season here. I'm sure in summer it is better. Everything needs paint.

Hugs,

Suzanne

edited to add pics

The Big Day: Wednesday April 26th

In two hours we will get picked up and driven 45 minutes to Orphanage #4. (If someone with speedy internet would like to find some webpages about this baby home/orphanage, that would be great. I know I have seen them, but cannot find them with Cyrillic Google and Dial-up.)

We had breakfast at the end of town (by the Blue Church) this morning and then walked and shopped our way home very slowly to try to use up the day. We bought all your presents in this distracted state so we will all be curious to see what random things you end up with. :)



Forgot to say that it snowed yesterday morning and stuck and allowed us some pretty pictures. It snowed again this morning, but did not stick, and by noon the sun was peeking out.

We will probably not get to update this until late tonight our time, which is early early morning your time, so check first thing in the morning for our news. Remember that we are not permitted to post specifics about the child/children until they are legally ours, but we can tell you general things about our day. Grandparents will receive emails with more details (as this is allowed), so if you are quite curious, call a Babushka or Dedushka tomorrow.

Love,

Suzanne

So much to Report!

First, we will meet all the children in Andy's group tomorrow at 4:00. If then we are still quite sure that we want to adopt two, we will ask for and presumably receive official permission to officially meet a little girl (who we would have informally interacted with as we play with all the kids in the group). There is no point asking for official permission unless we are dead certain that we will follow through. We will visit the orphanage (#4) from 4-6 on Wednesday and again from 10-12 on Thursday. On the Thursday visit we will meet with the physician, who will share the medical history and the social worker who will share the family history. We learned that Andy's group has seven kids and they are the little kids in a very large orphanage of school-age children.

Second, Yeah Dad, you're blogging now! and Yeah Tim as I assume Dad meant now passed instead of not passed.

Third, we had our medical exams today and agreed that the doctor was friendly and personable.It was a bit weird, but tolerable. We apparently passed. Here is a lovely shot of the hallway window in the otherwise dreary clinic.
Love,

Suzanne

edited to add pics, including these pics of military exercises in Lenin Square.